SHE - II

It was a sunday and it rained heavily. The hazy winds accomponied the rain and the sun was visible as a faint bleach in the wrath of black clouds. It was dark inside my house and it was just 1700hrs. Time seemed to come to a stand still and my mobile got switched off because of low battery.

I stood in the balcony to see how the rain god is casting his spell on the bystanders. There she was hiding with a baby in her hand under the poorly laid tin roof.

The rain drops percolated through her hairs and her eyes had a shade of bleakness. The child was crying. She is probably the mother of that child. She might be having a drunkard as her husband who boozes away all his earnings. She might be very well working in xerox shop or a telephone booth. And may be saving her fortunes to buy baby food.

She was wearing a wrinkled salwar and had a age-old mobile in her hand. The baby was still crying and she took out a feeding bottle from half torn jute bag hanging to her left shoulders.

I wonder what plans she has for the future. She would obviously like to make her son/daughter an engineer. She would obviously change the company if she feels that her manager is having a wrong motive. She may leave the kid in some missionary if she wants to end her life or she may very well become a nun or so.

We often attach a lot of respect towards things like pride,success..etc. Success is something like a light in the tunnel but its that of an approaching train. There she is standing in the rain with a wailing baby. She might very well have failed. But she is beautiful. All those wrinkles and bleakness that her hardships had given her had made her more beautiful. I dont see beauty in the coat of success. Its the failure and the hardships that makes one beautiful. Well.. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I went downstairs to grab a cup of hot chai. And there she came to the bakery with the baby. I saw her buying a cream bun and giving a small piece of it to the baby. I slowly walked near her and asked her gathering all my courage "How old are you?"

"19!" she said.

On Thinking and Relationships

What do you really mean when you say "I am thinking!". You recollect your memories and circumstances in the past and try to arrive at a solution for the current problem. The pre-conditioned mind gives you data from the vast memory repository that it has and you simply take a piece from the archive.

Now.. Do you really need to THINK in order to solve a problem. Is 'thought process' really helpful in solving a problem. From my past experiences, I have found that 'thinking' actually complicates the problem. 'Thinking' just sees a part of the problem and gives a solution for that. However, the vast majority of the problem which was unexplored in the past remains untouched.

Now I come to the most important aspect in human life - The relationships. By relation I mean friends, wife,lover,parents etc.. whom you think of even when they are not there. We approach towards a relationship with a pre-conceived notion. If you say 'NO' then you are telling a lie.
We think a lot before we involve ourselves in any relationship. We tend to draw parallels from the past relations and derive a hypothesis before we engage ourselves in a relation.

No one is alone in this world. If he/she tries to seclude themselves from the world then they are merely acting. All our mannerisms and characters are mended with every relation that we have. Relationships are the must for survival. Can you imagine getting yourself locked in a closed room for a week or so..?

But we really think a lot about the relationships and tend to complexify the entire chapter of it.
Some relationships are broken because of intensive thinking from both the sides. Relationships are not the ones that are to be approached via the tool of thinking. You need to do 'thinking' only when you want to draw some parallel from the past. Like when you want to write a code or something like that.

Relationship is a myriad path which was not discoverable by religion,sect, philosophy etc.. But merely by feeling it.

If I had raised a few questions in your mind. Then I am through. I wont think much about this post after I had posted it.

A hot cup of coffee and a teaspoon of philosophy

I was standing in the balcony and was enjoying a late evening coffee. I took the time to look at the twinkling stars of the evening sky. I had just read JK* and what else do you want to make your Sunday evening beautiful?
People worship success. Its what drives them happy everyday. Suddenly when they become void of success, there is a big vacuum. Success is like a black hole in the cosmos. It absorbs all the other feelings that surrounds it.
Have you ever looked at the women from village who carry pots on their head and walk towards the horizon..? Well, I met one of them last summer during my vacations. She was thin and pale and walks three kilometers for a pot of water. I asked her what success means to her. She gave me a sarcastic smile and told success means making her son a city-dweller.
I met her one more time last month and she was even more pale and was totally collapsed. Her son had become a drunkard. He was out of his own senses.
Now who is it to blame... The women..? Her son..? or the blind affection that manhood has towards success..?

Just because i am talking against 'success'.. Dont think that I say failure is fruitful.
My idea just to raise a few questions in the readers mind.

'Questions' makes one to feel happy. Especially asking a question which cannot be answered makes one feel even more happy. It triggers an inner quest then. The mind tries to find out the answer and hence explore. Have you noticed 'Question' has the word 'Quest' in it.

It is very important for one to come out of closed emotional quarters when asking questions. It is immaterial whether you are a Hindu or Christian or Muslim or a young man or a communist.. Any of these should not pose a constraint on you and your questions. Just keep asking the questions and the answers will start to come.
A Zen proverb says "When the student is ready, the teacher appears". Wat say?

Soon one can realize that happiness is not in success but in questions.

* - J Krishnamurthi, JK as he is fondly called by his readers is a philosopher. He is one of those philosophers who dont patronize religion. One can expect a rather serious narration style from him when compared to Osho, though at many places there is a unison between their philosophies. You can find his books in 1st floor in landmark under the section 'Eastern philosophy'.